Abandonment-to give up control of
In one of my devotions today, Oswald Chambers said that the "true test of abandonment is in refusing to say-'what about this?'" Talk about stepping on toes. I am a Math major for crying out loud! All I do is analize things and look at them logically, granted it is a major fault and hinderance spiritually that I've always had issues with, so I wasn't exactly excited when I read this.
On top of that I like being in control of things because I like them to go perfectly and smoothly and that can't happen unless it goes my way.....(cricket cricket)....Yeah i know thats all bologna but thats how I operate. I know thats neither true nor what I should try to accomplish but thats real talk.
Essentially, this means that God slapped me in the face today and said "Chill out, I got this!!!" And I am trying to be still and know that He is God
Aggressive Listening-actively blocking out distraction so that one my easily and deliberately hear
This was from my second devotion. I alwasy thought of listening as just sitting and hearing what someone had to say and I thought I could do that with God. I can, but there are so man distractions in life and in my life specifically that I must do more. I must turn off the TV, get off the computer, leave the video games alone, and yes, even silence the cell phone and give God some time to talk to me with no distractions so that I may hear it.
Simple enough, right? Yes and no. I find that I know a good deal, but I tend to not really know it until I have discovered it in teh pit of disaster in my life. And for me, I am discovering some of these things for the first time under pressure and it makes it real to me. Applicable. Tangible. Doable. Effective.
I hope this doesn't bore you but there is bound to be someone out there like me that is hard headed and learns the hard way. Even if there isn't, I still like logging my discoveries this way, writing it helps me review and oddly enough I view this as a form of accountability lol :)
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